Heather (Part 2 of The Trilogy)

Carol:

               In the previous story, Agatha (Edith) told about seeing a miracle in Heather’s life when she was able to talk again after becoming mute. Now, Heather tells us what happened to cause her to lose her voice and then regain it through God’s grace. This is what inspired Agatha, and many others, to tell their stories.

Heather

            I grew up in a tiny community in Kansas, I went to church and I knew my neighbors. I was a good girl, a Christian. I was home-schooled, and sheltered. My parents had me go through purity training,   I wore a “true love waits” ring and I had never been kissed throughout all of high school.  

            The youth group boys loved me, and they chased me and I didn’t relent. In fact, I was pretty clueless. I considered myself to be pimple-filled and scrawny. And so not worth pursuing.

            I graduated high school super early, and I headed to a university and I moved into the dorms. What happens next is going to sound stupid or cheesy or straight up unbelievable. Or if anything like some badly written dateline special.

            I saw an ad on the billboard at the dorm. “Free room and board to nanny for 3 kids.” They listed the requirements and the thing that stood out the most to me was that they wanted. “A good Christian girl with comparable home-school values to our own.” I knew how to be that!!! I was that!! And to me it sounded like an amazing saving thing. I wouldn't have to be at college with the drinking, drugs and most of all, with the guys.

            So I called the number.

            A woman answered and told me all about her three children and the different activities they liked, and agreed to meet me at their home for an interview. And to go ahead and bring my things just in case it worked out. I excitedly wrote down the address in the small suburb hidden away from the bustle. And got my things together.

            And then I did something that I will look back on forever and regret. I signed out of the dorms and left.

            I drove to the address suggested and met Anna, who told me that her children were at her mother’s but proceeded to lead me through an interview.

            I suspected nothing.

            Her husband came home and I interviewed with him. His wife brought tea in. And I sat on the sofa between them and before I knew it I was asleep.

            I woke up in what I thought was a garage. I was brutally, and grossly, raped. After that horrific experience, he picked me up and took me back inside. We saw a couple of people along the way but they all were quiet and looked away from my guard-dog.

            I figured out, finally, that there were no children.

            I looked at him and I knew that he was probably the handsomest man I had ever seen.

            But he was also the most evil. I turned to try to run out of the room. But he grabbed me. Slinking closer to me like a snake, he whispered in my ear “Hello little girl” and then he licked my ear. I whimpered and tried to turn away.

            “My name is Adam. I am your beginning and your end. I will make you worth something. I decide what that is. What I say is your world now. You do not have a choice or an opinion. God created men to be over women. God created me to be over you. God never wanted women to be anything other than seed bearers and instruments of pleasure. That is your calling. Your parents have lied to you your whole life. A woman only needs to be pure for a man to break her open. Like a pomegranate or an orange. It’s not the sanctity of marriage but the power that comes with being a man. I don't profess to be a man of God, my sins are far too great. But I do think that my calling is to show self-righteous young women their worth. I am that I am. I am your Alpha and your Omega. And you are what I say you are.”

With that he proceeded to cut away my clothes with a pair of scissors and when they were all in shreds on the floor I stood there crying in front of him. He leaned in and kissed me, and then calmly took off my “true love waits” ring.

            I screamed and cried, and he grabbed me by the hair and dragged me to the kitchen and turned on the burner. I started to scream for real then. I was worried he was going to burn me. Instead he handed me the ring and told me to drop it into the hot blue flame. (The editors have decided to leave out most of the details of Heather’s abuse.)
Screaming I dropped the ring.

            He looked me square in the eyes and whispered.

            “I am that I am.”

            I passed out.

            I spent the next month in a crash course of torture and sexual abuse. Brought on by more people then I want to even count. And then by month two it had become so common place and mundane that I was almost used to it, but I kept fighting. I tried to defend myself from the men he brought in, and even drew blood. But, then, by month three, I stopped talking at all. And I wouldn't talk again for quite some time.

            I will spare you all the details of my time in human trafficking, I don't feel it’s necessary to relive all of it. But I was in that life for about a year. And by the time I wasn't, I was incredibly broken. The things that had happened made me afraid to even speak.

            But the end came and it was glorious, Adam took me into the big city to buy some clothes and he made a mistake. He let me get sized at a bra store. And the attendant saw all of the scars, bruises, and brands that were on my breasts. She called the police. I went home with Adam that day. But then the next day, the police showed up at his door. Because they had a traffic ticket he had forgotten about.

            That day I went home. Finally after an indescribable year I went home.

            I wish I could say that going home and seeing my family fixed everything, but it didn't. I still wasn't talking. My parents had no idea what to do with me. They ended up finding a half-way house that could help. I had never developed a drug problem or an alcohol issue, but they feared that I might end up like that. Mainly I needed a safe place to heal and to be loved. So I moved in.

            But I still wasn't talking.

            And the obnoxious lady who ran it suggested I go meet with this other girl who had been in a similar situation. I was pretty upset about that. And then she said, “her name is Natalie” and my blood started to boil.

            You see, in my eyes, everything that had happened to me was Natalie’s fault. She was Adam's ex-girlfriend until she got away from him. The girl who, he said, had caused his pervertedness. The girl who made him so angry that now he took that out on other women. He made it clear that she was also a Christian and a home-schooled girl. He had a type.

            I was not going to meet with that girl.

            But I did.

            And I slapped her.

            But she stayed. Why did she stay? She had been through what I had been through and now she cared for me! What happened after is still a wonderment to me. She walked me through her pain and my own. She helped me heal in ways I didn't think were even possible. She led my wandering and frayed heart back to Jesus and I couldn't be more thankful. She's one of my best friends now.

            Now I know what I want to be, I know I can forgive. I know I can love passionately and furiously. I know that God chases us to the very pits of hell and back to find us. I know that even when something horrific has happened. And when your heart becomes stone, even still He calls us cherished and loved and HIS.

            I have experienced never ending and overwhelming grace, and I believe that it’s my mission to show others that same grace and love. I am so thankful that I have been brought thus far by the help of the Lord. I am so thankful that I am free.

Carol:

               For those who are wondering, Adam is now in prison and will be for a long time! The next story is Natalie’s story. This is the prequel to Heather’s story. It has been amazing to see how God has blessed this woman and brought her from bondage to freedom.